Ha! I hear that quite a bit, actually. Woody and Judy Davis are playing Jesse's parents. Penelope Cruz is in it, too.
He was! The Academy is terrible at acknowledging new, young talent, so I was rooting for him just because.
(There are times where I seriously think that he is)

Of course, because of her, he's learned all about fancy French undergarments.

Apparently we missed all the scenes where he murdered Shosanna's family, kicked puppies, and proceeded to be raging bigot with a playing card stuck to his forehead.
It's utterly ridiculous, you're absolutely correct. As we see in the film and as Quentin elaborated upon, through his genuine affection for her, Fred is unknowingly hurting Sho by being so open and kind to her. It's difficult enough for her, with the barriers she's built up over the years just to cope with her trauma, so indeed, how the fuck is she suddenly going to subjugate herself to the likes of Landa and Hellstrom? That's the beauty and tragedy of her relationship with Fredrick and the projection booth scene; out of everyone and everything, it's the young war hero who is able to get through to her. Even Mel's talked about this, and how Sho was dead inside until meeting him. With the film, Quentin, the actors, and the script to support the Sho/Fred dynamic, I can't see how any other character would make sense being paired with her. Not Bridget (nice a thought as it is), not Marcel, not Aldo, not goddamn fucking Hans Landa. It's Fredrick who affected her so deeply. It's Fredrick who was able to break her heart. We see her break down in anguish, but it's because of Fredrick in the projection booth scene that we see a glimpse of the person Shosanna was before losing her family; the real Shosanna who was buried under years of grief and torment. Likewise, we see the extent of the damage from the war on Fredrick. The way he shoots her without opening his eyes, without any thought, just soldier instinct, and how anguished and heartbroken he is once he sees what he's done. The way he struggles to pull that trigger a final time, not out of malice, but out of mercy and love is gorgeous. He loved her until the very end.
Fans can like Hans and Hellstrom all they want, but once Shosanna is dragged into it, I cannot tolerate it. Write as many OCs and Mary-Sues as they please, but pairing Shosanna with anyone not Fredrick makes their ship null, void, and totally out of character for her (not to mention totally missing the point of her).
Of course, you know this; I just have to rehash it every now and then.
Generally, tumblr can get it right. I made fun of Hellstrom/Shosanna once and the absolute personal offense taken to it was hilarious.

Absolutely we'll have to! I'm very glad I did, too. I am surprised by my patience with it, as it took time to just let the story develop. I watched (and still am watching) many films along with my extensive research and I just let the ideas flow. The biggest part of it was deciding to make it post-war, which led to cutting various characters and plotlines. It was a huge risk and it made me uncomfortable at first, but it worked out much better than I could have imagined (especially for Aviva and Manfried, who are the very heart of it).

Omg yes. I think Earth Died Screaming works well for Fredrick and his p.o.v. (I also love Nobody as the summation of his feelings for Shosanna).

I consider sleep to be a favorite pastime of mine. Until, of course, I remember that I have way too much to do than just lie in bed.

As would I. It'd be an excruciating death, I imagine, but there'd be rainbows and unicorns, too.